We’ve probably all been there, one time or another: that little variation of the quarter-to-mid-life crisis, where it’s a weekend and you decide to fire up the ol’ Facebook, Twitter or whatever blog feed you have. Suddenly, your feed is filled with all these pictures of people in some exotic location, indulging in some newfangled food fad, showing off something they just bought, etc. Enjoying life in all its forms, you get the idea.
And then it sets in: that little pang of jealousy, small at first, sometimes growing fast, sometimes slow, into an entire what-the-fuck-am-I-doing-with-my-life crisis. Variations of these include the my-life-is-going-nowhere crisis, the all-my-friends-have-it-better-than-me crisis, and the I-am-not-getting-any-younger crisis, among others. All because you decided to look at your feed.
Thing is, what most don’t realize is that what you’re going up against is the combined special little events of your entire circle of friends when you scroll down that wall. If keeping up with the Joneses is hard enough, imagine keeping up with a thousand of them, each one a Jones probably for that one weekend only.
It makes me think that seeing the highlights of so many others’ lives all laid out in front of us makes us think more of others’ lives than our own. As we try to chase down every big thing we see, somewhere down that road we lose the little, the simple: sleeping in on a rainy day, having an extra cup of coffee and taking a really long time with it, reading a few pages more into that book you promised yourself you’d finish by the end of 2012 (to think that 2013’s ending pretty soon too). The little pleasures that can’t be contained in a single photograph or line of text, because they are not meant to be visual, not even to be visualized.
We, as a generation, need to learn that we are the ones in charge of our own happiness, and that happiness can sometimes be so personal that sharing it would be nothing less than sacrilegious. It may be too introverted a mindset for some, I know, but think about it: falling in love a second time is something you’ll never be able to fully explain to someone who has never had his/her heart broken, right?
Today, I woke up at 3pm, looked over a few Magic: the Gathering decklists to try out, built my Lego Superman vs Lex Luthor set, practiced on the saxophone for around half an hour (I think I need to buy new reeds soon), checked up on a few toy orders I had pending confirmation, ate two dinners, and wrote this post down.
Today was a good day.